Understanding your Partner is a Narcissist
Better Than Winning The Lottery
Why would I make such a crazy statement?
It wouldn’t matter how much money you won or have in the bank, if you are in a relationship with a narcissist, life would remain to be a miserable existence and most importantly, you would still be living in a world devoid of love, of empathy, of compassion, a world where pain and darkness prevail.
Many men and woman who are in relationsips with narcissists, are extremely wealthy individuals in the stict monetary sense. However, these men and women are destitute in any form of emotional support.
Understanding your partner is a narcissist – finally helps you put all the pieces of the puzzle together as you understand with total clarity:-
You are NOT Crazy, it’s simple your partner is a Narcissist!
If you are beginning to understand you maybe in a relationship with a narcissist, Download here my my FREE 5 Day Recovery From A Narcissistic Relationship, to help you begin your healing process.
The moment you reach this realization, is a moment you will never forget.
The palpable relief from knowing finally what is going on and realizing with 100% clarity that you are not crazy & you are most definitely not losing your mind.
Why do I say this?
I have been in this exact position. I honestly thought I was losing my mind, or suffering from deep post-natal depression, with my new-born baby. Second guessing every, tiny, minute decision I had to make, to ensure everything was 100% perfect. I was lost, feeling helpless and hopeless at everything, and the stress which overtook my life, as I felt I was forever walking on egg shells. I felt nothing I could do was ever good enough, as that’s how my husband made me feel. I wasn’t thin enough, pretty enough, clever enough, simply not enough.
When I understood what I was dealing with, life started to now make sense. No longer did 2 plus 2 equal 5, I now had an answer as to why my once loving husband had evolved into a cold, calculating and cruel human being. It didn’t matter how often he would profess his love to me, actions are what matter, so take note of what your partner does, not what they say. Words are exactly that words.
When you understand your partner is a Narcissist, it can feel like you have found the missing piece from a million-piece jigsaw, that you have been searching for too bloody long? It’s as if somebody switched the lights back on, after living in a world of darkness. You can have a life full of promise, love and light, but not when you are in a relationship with a Narcissist.
Below are the 3 common traits of a Narcissist:-
- You have lost your sense of self-worth. Your relationship that began in a wonderous love bubble, has now slowly and silently, eroded your confidence, your self-esteem, your sense of self, as you feel you can’t do anything right in the eyes of your partner. Your partner makes life difficult in many different areas of your life, yet the most difficult to understand is his dislike of your life-long friends, the ones that have stuck by you during the good and the bad times. He makes socializing or spending any time with them so uncomfortable that you have stopped seeing them, trying to bring peace back into to your relationship?
- Financial Control. Financial control is Domestic Abuse, which many women don’t understand. Regardless if you work or are a stay at home mother, not having access to all finances, not being able to view all financial statements, nor being involved in any financial decisions is absolute Domestic Abuse. This happens to many women, I can put my hand up and admit this was me. I was in a high paying six figure salary, yet I allowed this to happen. I’m not ashamed to admit it, I simply implicitly trusted my husband and couldn’t see his controlling, narcissistic actions until it was too late.
- Lying. It probably has taken you a long time to comprehend how frequently your partner lies to you. At first when you questioned something that didn’t feel right, they would deflect your question or have a perfectly reasonable answer that made sense. Over time when you know for a fact they are lying, their response has reverted to turning the conversation upside down and in the end you will be accused of lying. I’m sure you are reading this and agreeing with me. Sadly, lying over time, erodes your trust in your partner, as anybody who lies cannot be trusted. Is this who you want to spend the rest of your life with?
Narcissists, believe it or not, are inherently insecure people. This is why they need to discredit you their partners, eroding whatever confidence they can, to ensure that you don’t shine or stand out in any way. There is only room for the narcissistic to sparkle, and he or she will extract as much of your energy and vitality as they humanly can, while you remain in the relationship. This is their modus operandi, as these humans will do anything to destroy you and call it love.
You have to understand, if your partner was the confident person they portray to the outside world, then why would they need to criticize, insult and treat you the way they do? Narcissists pick the best, the brightest, the prettiest, the smartest, to make them look better, so please remember that.
I want to end with what I feel is the most important point, which is – ‘You are absolutely 150% perfect exactly as you are.’ I’m sure your partner has somehow led you to believe that you are not good enough in many different areas, understand with absolute certainty, it’s simply bullshit.
You are perfect exactly as you are, and don’t let anybody tell you anything different.